Hey everyone, how are you guys doing?
I finished my exam today for the semester and I feel so relieved!
The journey to this point is seriously not easy. at. all.
Let me tell you a little bit about my background. I am Indonesian, spent my whole 23 years old in Indonesia. I studied in private school and for university I took a major in Mass Communication in The London School of Public Relation, Jakarta. I got degree in communication. Then, I took Worship Music study in Hillsong International Leadership College in Sydney Australia for two years.And right now, I am joining a master degree program in Det teologiske Menighetsfakultet, or the easy way to pronounce it is “MF” in Oslo, Norway, in a major Religion, Society and Global Issues for another 1 1/2 years. I honestly never picture myself to be in the position I am right now, because I never really into studying, but guess what? I spent 18 and half years of my life for studying.
The first time I went to the class, I don’t understand any single thing that the teacher said because he speaks so formally and it left me frozen. It was overwhelming to face all of the requirements for studying, like READING BOOKS. Guys and girls, let me tell you something, I am not a reading person, yes, I do love reading blogs, facts, magazine, news, etc. But when you see this hundreds pages of book with heavy title like “Terror in The Mind of God” or “The New Religious Intolerance: Overcoming the Politics of Fear in an Anxious Age”. I mean… seriously? (Is there any Donald Duck comic somewhere?). Forget to mention I have 3 subjects and each subjects has at least 5 or more literatures, in total roughly around 15 freaking books and articles? How can I survive? *I am sinking! Please bring me to the shore* Kidding, I am not sinking, but almost.
Anyway, these whole new environment of study in Western country really is overwhelming and also very hard. I’ve been crying like 5 times at least this semester because I am scared, I don’t know if I’m gonna get through, I don’t know if I am capable enough to finish the exams. I was so freaking out. It was so hard for me to understand even one book. How silly. Just in case you forget, I finished all my three exams well. I don’t know what grade I will get, nor I care. All I know, I did my best and I would not worry for the result. Through this post I really want to say thank you to people who always believe in me, I seriously would not be able to go through this without you guys. So thank you very much for your constant prayers, supports and love.
I know this is just the first semester, some of you maybe think I am weird, and it’s okay. This semester, is not “just” a first semester, this is me stepping on something bigger, stepping on something that I never think I would be able to do. Something bigger than my ability but not my capacity, because I know that I can always learn to do something. Went through this semester has made me realize that my capacity is bigger than what I think I have as well as my ability. I remember talking to God in the morning on the way to school (almost everytime) and I said to Him “Please help me to go through this, I need You”. Yes, He brought me through. He loves me. I know :’)
Everytime, where I feel like I want to give up, I always ended up to choose to not to give up and just keep pushing. I told everyone “It is hard, but I am not giving up yet.” And I will never give up.
Through this post, I want to say thank you to all the people who always supports me, people who always be there for me through thick and thin.
Torstein, my amazing husband ❤ – Thank you for always keeps me accountable, thank you for being the biggest supporter and always believe in me more than I believe in myself. Thank you for your constant prayers and love. Thank you for every shoulder you shared for me to cry on. Thank you for always being patient and understanding. I am so so grateful for you. I don’t think I will able to finish my study without your support. So, thank you. I love you so much.
For my parents – You guys always been a great example for me to learn from. Your dedication unto something has made me learn to not giving up. Thank you for always believing in me and know that I can nail this. I love you.
For my classmates – Riko, Ingebjørg, Lisa, Brooke, Ilse. You girls really help me a lot through this semester. Thank you for being so generous with your knowledge and so kind. I seriously would never make it without you guys. So, thank you so much! I really appreciate all of you!
I still can’t believe that I am done, I AM DONE! I AM DONE! for this semester… hahaha… I still do not know what I am into hahaha, but all I know and I believe I’ve been preparing for something bigger ahead. For now, hello Holiday! CHRISTMAS!
For all of you out there who might face the same problems, please do not give up. Keep going and keep trying! ❤